Key To Successfully Building Your Business Vision: Personal Beliefs

Only after you’ve looked inward to know yourself can you remove the blindfold and create a vision for your life.

“Vision” is a mysterious thing to most people. In work, life and even in school, people are told to ‘Start with a vision.’ They are being asked to see something that does not yet exist; to imagine an outcome that will take an unknown journey along an undefined roadmap.

What’s more is that this vision must be your own. It can’t be for others to see and follow. It has to be your personal beacon in a sea of distractions and obstacles. But as a leader, you’ll often need to share that vision, have others buy into the vision, and find ways to have them help you bring that vision to life within the context of how each of them see the world and their own visions for the future.

That’s how most people see it, and why most people fail to create and follow a vision in their lives. It all seems too hard, too difficult to obtain as an ocean of effort. But there is one principle truth that makes having and sharing and accomplishing a vision both easier to realize and see to fruition:

When a vision is based on a core belief, the vision creates itself.

This is where most people put the cart before the horse. They build a vision without identifying the underlying, supporting belief that must live in their core to allow that vision to live and survive over the long run. So before you try to define your vision as a leader, here are some steps that will lead you to a vision that works for you:

1. Figure out who you are – This may take some work, but sit down with your favorite beverage in a quiet spot without any distractions and write down all the beliefs you have; beliefs about yourself, people, the world, religion, politics, science, health, friendship, family, work, etc. Give yourself a couple of hours (this is important, so give yourself the time to do it right). Pen your thoughts in free form to let your mind flow. Write anything that enters your consciousness, big or small…both mind-blowing and mundane. Don’t edit unless you find you’re not being honest with yourself. You won’t show this to anyone, so allow yourself to be open and real with what you write.
2. Figure out what you’re passionate about – Now that you have your list together, create a scoring system for your beliefs. What beliefs stir emotion in you? What gets you excited or makes you want to jump up and act? I, for example, believe that the greatest gift of our intellect is the power to educate. It is what drives me to learn, to study, and to offer what I learn to others freely. It is what gets me out of bed each morning and the yardstick by which I measure my success. I also have a belief that pizza is the greatest food in the world. Does that belief get me excited about expressing my inner self through the creation and sharing of this delicious Italian pie? No, but some people do feel this way.
3. Take what’s important and visualize living a life based on those beliefs – If you were critical in the last step about what sits at the top of your passion list, you probably ended up with 1-2 strong beliefs about yourself and different areas of life (work, family, friends, religion, politics, etc). Take that list and recreate it on a new sheet of paper or document. This step is your virtual stripping away of the things that are interesting, but not passion-driving influences in your life.   With your new list in hand, build a vision for each belief on what actions you can take to support, drive and live that belief. Envision what life looks like when you are living fully connected with these beliefs. Again, this should be somewhat free form, and again think big and small…your actions in aggregate will help define the next step.
4. Work your visions for actions and activities into single statements – Here you are finally ready for the proverbial cart. Think of what you’ve written for each belief as a short story. What would the title of that story be? What overarching theme is your vision for that belief? What are all the activities and actions you can take to support that belief creating in the way of a world view? I’ve seen this step take hours and I’ve seen this step take days to complete. It’s not easy, but it will be something you need to do to create manageable “mantras” for living your life. Once you have them, write them down in places you can refer to them: at home, in your car, at the office, etc. Refer to them often to remind yourself where you are heading and why.

Yes, this will take some work and a lot of thought, but on the other side lies a focus and understanding that will help you achieve your goals. You may want to go through this activity from start to finish a few times in your life. You may even revise the last step a couple times as you learn and start to live your vision. But whatever you do, you can have confidence in knowing that the visions you’ve built and are living by will 1) be your own, 2) be based on something you hold true at your core, and 3) be something you can communicate and explain clearly to others…all signs that you have the right vision for your life.

Leadership Means Letting Others Learn From Adversity

Hardships often prepare ordinary people for extraordinary destiny. – C.S. Lewis

It is our natural instinct to want to help others. We see someone struggling and our first reaction is to do what we can to resolve their issue. We empathize, internalize their struggle, and make it our own. This happens with our friends, family, spouses, kids, employees, co-workers and even strangers.

Normally, stepping up and inserting ourselves into a situation to help someone else is a welcomed action. A bit of hesitation maybe on the other person’s part that they may be troubling you, but in most cases the helping hand is a relief. The issue gets resolved together and everyone is happy.

A good thing…right? Not always.

When someone has an opportunity to learn from a difficult situation, you are hurting more than helping when you resolve the issue for them.

It’s a thin line that determines when you should jump in and stay out, but there are some steps you can take to help you stop and think before moving in with all your wisdom and resolution skills. I call it PADDing a situation:

1. Pause: Giving it a moment, relaxing, and thinking about the situation is usually a good first move. Consider what this person can learn from the situation. If someone is trying to figure out an Excel function or how to craft a difficult email to a co-worker, allow them the chance to connect their own neurons and have the experience logged into their memory. If someone is trying to push their car off to the side of the road because they ran out of gas, the lessons probably been learned and giving them some assistance would be appropriate.
2. Ask: This is what many people ask when they see someone faced with a challenge: “Do you need some help?” Wrong question. Here is the question you should be asking: “What are you working on?” This question 1) keeps you out of the situation, 2) helps you assess the other person’s level of frustration, and 3) let’s you know if you can even be helpful in the first place . It also gives them permission to inform you, dismiss you and/or ask you for help, which you still should not do until you…
3. Discuss: Talk it through. Don’t solve it for them – guide them to the answer. Let them know what you did the last time you faced a similar situation (or what first step you would take). In the examples above, you might say “The last time I needed that, I found the answer using the Excel help function.” or “Whenever I have to write those kinds of emails, I usually ask myself two questions: ‘What am I trying to really say?’ and ‘What is the other person probably feeling?'” Once you have given pause, asked the right question, and given them a nudge (vs. a shove), then you have to…
4. Determine: Now it’s time for you to ask yourself some questions. Is this out of this person’s abilities to accomplish? Is the answer too complex? Is the person completely off in the wrong direction in looking for an answer? Most importantly, ask yourself if the lesson learned is important. Be really critical of yourself as you ask these questions. By solving a problem for someone, you risk robbing them of an opportunity, making them feel incompetent or stupid, and possibly embarrassing them. Move in only if you feel like “the juice isn’t worth the squeeze” for the other person.

I say this a lot, but as a leader it’s your job to take ownership of a situation and do what’s best for the other person. Thinking the other person is going to get mad at you for not helping is not a reason to interfere. You have to give other person the chance to stretch their limits, to see that they are capable of doing more than even they believe they can. When they figure it out, give them praise and acknowledge their accomplishment. Most people will appreciate what you’ve done for them when you let them grow…even if they don’t express it. People can overcome most problems when are given the time and encouragement to have confidence in themselves.

Resolving Conflicts in Your Work Relationships

Does this remind you of anyone?

When it comes to confronting difficult people at work, we all feel challenged on a level that’s hard to compare to other situations in the work environment. Unfortunately, speaking to that person directly is usually not the action we take – replaced by either hesitation, coddling or, in extreme cases, complete avoidance of the individual. Why? Because most people are fearful that any action would lead to a worse situation than simply ignoring the person’s abrasive or downright abusive behavior. Yes, there are those who confront others easily without as much as a bat of the eye. But without a good understanding of the situation and the right approach, this can easily lead to irreparable damage to the relationship or even a “friendly” meeting with HR.

People I’ve coached on this topic have most often expressed concern that, if they confront the other person, he/she will either retaliate, make their life at work difficult or at best cause a scene. I’ve also heard statements made of futility, that it’s useless to speak up because ‘There’s no point. The person will never change.’

I’m not going to pretend that this isn’t sometimes the case. There are folks who think they’re perfect, don’t care about how they are coming across, and are not open to change. I have found, however, that most of the people we find challenging either a) know they are imperfect, b) have heard similar feedback, or c) are not aware of how they are coming across. In these cases, I’ve usually found people are willing and open to change (or at least try). If you have a situation like this and feel a relationship with this person is salvageable, here are some steps you can take towards improving the issue and, hopefully, creating a better work environment for both of you.

1. Put your perception in a positive place.

You have to start here. Without believing that the situation can be worked out, your approach will come across as defensive or accusatory or both. Your words need to come from a place where you genuinely want to work things out without a desire to make the other person feel bad or regretful. Once you can confidently and honestly get to this place, go on to step 2.

2. Plan the right time & place…for both of you.

In your office or just when the other person is trying to leave for the day would be the wrong approach. Schedule an offsite lunch or casual dinner (no drinking) with the person, just the two of you. A neutral environment is important for both of you to feel secure and physically “separates” the issue from work. It goes without saying, but don’t plan 30 minutes if that’s what time you need to get your conversation out. Leave time for discussion. The other person may need some validation or additional communication from you and deserves the time as well.

3. Focus communication on the problem, not the person.

You have to own this situation with the other person. You cannot put the blame solely on their head. This is critical for yielding a positive outcome from your discussion. Avoid any name calling, direct accusations or statements that start “You’re being…”.  Instead start with something along the lines of “There are differences between us I’m hoping we can discuss and maybe I can learn what I can do better to create a more positive relationship between us.” It is important that you stress how valuable a good working relationship is for both of you and that this is the goal you hope the two of you can reach together. From there, work towards defining the cause of the problem; maybe you have conflicting goals or objectives, maybe you’re both under a lot of stress or maybe each of your communication styles are simply hard for the other to understand. Defining the problem in a way that both you and the other person agree upon removes blame and allows you to address the real issue, not the other person’s self-esteem.

4. Allow for venting, and then strive for a partnership.

While you may be focused on the future, there may be some need for the other person to express how he/she is feeling about a past situation or conversation. Here is where you have to be the listener and validator. Be empathetic and patient in hearing the other person out, but don’t add to the discussion over details regarding a past event, not one comment. Your goal is to focus on the future and how the two of you can partner to make sure what happens from this moment on is positive. If the other person is asking for all the change to come from you, begin ideas with ‘Can we both…?’ or ‘If I…, will you …?’. Come together on future agreements; don’t split up over past disagreements.

5. Consider following up with a written recap.

If there is a trust issue or a history of problems, you may want to communicate in writing what you’ve discussed. Simply send that person (and only that person…no blind CCs) an email, thanking them for their time, communicating gratitude that you were able to talk it out, expressing hope that the future holds better opportunities to work together and, most importantly, what was agreed upon. For your own protection, it is also important to keep a personal record of past situations, how you reacted at the time, the meeting/discussion you had to resolve the issues, and length of time until any issues happened again. Your records may be important if you need to escalate the situation or HR is asked to get involved.

6. Expect another discussion.

Unless the issue was a blatant misunderstanding or you both have uncommon ability to change your personalities on a dime, there will likely be another moment where an issue that arises. This shouldn’t be looked at as a setback; rather, take this as an opportunity to learn, communicate and recommit to a positive relationship. If there has been progress, it should be celebrated and made the focus of the discussion. If you don’t feel any progress was made, don’t get frustrated. As long as you’re making an honest effort to respect the agreement and create a positive work environment, then start with step 1 again and follow through. Sometimes people need to be shown that a situation isn’t going to be ignored, but it also won’t be handled unprofessionally. You might be tempted to ignore or escalate the situation, especially now that you’ve applied additional effort to resolve the situation, but consider arranging another meeting with the same process to try and get results from your hard work and efforts.

7. Be smart and protect yourself.

Again, there are people who you’re just not going to be able to work things out with, but you have to assume from the beginning that you can if you hope to resolve these issues that may be affecting both your work output and your stress levels. Here are a couple of quick tips to make sure you are positioning yourself for the best possible outcome:

• If you sense you’ve picked the wrong time, place or you messed up a step, start back at step 1 and be patient with working through this process.
• If the person can be particularly volatile, then make sure you take the suggestion of a public place that allows for a private conversation (like a restaurant).
• If you think they are likely to accuse you of a serious violation of company policy, like harassment or physical threats, agree to have a person from HR join you at that meeting
• If the issue is serious and can’t be resolved, then do your best to protect yourself (and your mental health) and do what you can to make the best of a bad situation. If this means moving on – after management has been made aware of the situation but taken no action – then work towards making that happen.

My hope is that you never have to take these steps and that all your relationships are positive and healthy. But should you find yourself needing the advice above, I believe there is some solace in knowing that almost all of us face with this type of situation at least once in our careers. It’s how we chose to handle it that will determine both the outcome and, maybe more importantly, the way we look back on it when the situation no longer exists.

Follow Timeless Truths: Iacocca’s 9 C’s of Leadership

Management is nothing more than motivating other people. – Lee Iacocca

One of my favorite leadership reads is Lee Iacocca’s  Where Have all the Leaders Gone. The title makes him sounds like a cranky old man shouting “Kids these days…they don’t know anything” from the rooftops. Maybe that’s why I enjoy it so much. Mr. Iacocca doesn’t pull punches. He tells it like it is from an era when you didn’t beat around the bush and worry about hurting someone’s feelings despite the fact that it might be exactly what they need.

There’s a lot to this book, but a core lesson is his 9 C’s of Leadership. Like any good writer, he tries to make the concept easily digestible. To that end, I’ve been able to remember a few without consulting the text, but I like to open it up every year or so and ask myself if I’m exhibiting these behaviors on a regular basis:

#1 Curiosity: Listen to people outside the “Yes, sir” crowd. Avoid sycophants (one of my favorite words). Read voraciously.

#2 Creative: Leadership is all about managing change. Go out on a limb and always check to see if your thinking too inside a box.

#3 Communicate: Talk to everybody, even your enemies. Engagement with others is how we stay informed and learn.

#4 Character: Have the guts to do the right thing. Without character, the rest won’t amount to much.

#5 Courage: Taking a position and showing integrity even when you know it will cost you.

#6 Conviction: Fire in your belly. Believing in your core that what you’re doing is right. Think Steve Jobs or Jeff Bezos.

#7 Charisma: The ability to inspire through trust, rather than fear or anger.

#8 Competent: Know what you’re doing and, more importantly, surround yourself with people who know what they’re doing.

#9 Common sense: Your ability to reason and think critically (especially when overly concerned or excited).

The final point: The biggest C is crisis. Leadership is forged in times of crisis. The test of a leader is rarely found in times of prosperity. These qualities are needed to be a great leader, but they are critical to remain a great leader when times turn tough.

From Manager To Leader: Making The Leap

Making the jump between managing and leading takes vision, courage and the ability to let go of what works to find what works better.

Where are we going? Who’s in charge? How are things going to be better tomorrow than they are today? These are the questions that will be on the minds of those around you when you’re managing instead of leading.

I say “on the minds” specifically because you probably won’t be aware that this is what your team or peers are thinking. From the where you sit, in your own mind, you may believe you are being a good leader because everyone is following you. But leading isn’t about having people follow, it’s about motivating and inspiring in others such a compulsion to follow that it’s all they want to do. When these questions are being asked, leadership status cannot be attained.

There are many examples of  failed businesses that were being managed and not led (Blockbuster, Blackberry, Circuit City, Nokia, etc).  If you search through the achieves and read any of the public statements made by these CEOs during their decline, the common thread is a lack of leadership. There was a lot of “We’re going to continue to deliver…”, but very little in the way of “why” the business was going to turn around or how specific issues that were causing the decline were going to be overcome.  During this time, I guarantee that employees were having closed door discussions and spending lunch hours grumbling about the issues and missed opportunities and wondering why nothing was happening.

So why did managers running these long-standing organizations fail to lead, inspire through vision, achieve the needed changes, and turn their ships around? Why did they fail to visualize and act before things got so far gone? Because to change means to admit you’re doing things wrong, which is usually the only nail needed for the coffin if not done quickly. But that’s just the first step. To initiate and create permanent change means to let go of stability, create a new vision that is strategically sound, and communicate that vision in a way that inspires a cultural sense of urgency.

As the person in charge, you need to be the one who sees clearly and separate what works from what doesn’t. That’s managing. But if you wish to lead, you need to find (and encourage others to find) new, innovative ideas and ways of improving your team, department and overall business.